


lost, not forgotten

by black_leo



Category: Infinite (Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-07
Updated: 2016-07-07
Packaged: 2018-07-22 02:19:27
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,572
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7415443
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/black_leo/pseuds/black_leo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>For two boys just being honestly and deeply inlove, they show two different images: one who's willing to leave and put the other's safety and happiness first; and the other who will never give up even if he ends up badly hurt.</p>
            </blockquote>





	lost, not forgotten

**Author's Note:**

> Hey, hello. Here's another myungjong fic that I've posted in aff before, since board exams are over, I'll be happy to post more stories in the future. Hoping you'll enjoy!

We were once dreamers, laughing at our childish wishes, of reaching the sun and snatching stars for our own pleasure. It has always been bearable for the two of us; despite of the world slowly crumbling to ashes, of death lurking in corners and suddenly lunges to unsuspecting individuals.

It was quite harsh, the way people treat us, right? We were born in the wrong time and place, and you keep on saying that the place doesn’t decide whether we fit in or not. Even though they kept on calling us pests, since we don’t have parents anymore. The war snatched them away from us, so we both left home and kept on travelling since we’re sure those that we left behind our once homes would be happy about the news of their loss.

We’ve always asked the adults about the world, what history we don’t know of, and what’s more to come, yet they kept their lips sealed. We’ve heard about tales of landmarks that were crushed by the conflicts of the high governments and were replaced by battle stations or remodeled public communities.

Division based on the state in life were strongly imposed thus, we could hardly find a job to keep us with our daily needs, for we’re still too young back then, and when described based on our position in the society, they call us little vermin. And we just held back our laughter every damn time.

And then, how funny that I suddenly took notice of you more than before, like how slender your fingers are or how soft your hair is. Every single thing about you were all the reason that made my heart skip a beat and my favorite old book on history couldn’t even make me feel that way despite of all the stories of courageous warriors and battles won printed on it.

And you noticed, didn’t you?

The way I held your hand for longer, with you caught me gazing at your face when you’re woke up by your bad dreams, and those I cared more than I should.

We wanted to attend an academe, study history or probably astronomy since we’ve always adored stargazing and sketching maps of constellations based on that ragged book I’ve given to you as a gift, which of course you didn’t want to accept for it was given to me by my late grandfather who was called the old crazy man of the rouge street for collecting antiques and telling tales that weren’t allowed by the officials. You remembered that our street lined by brick dull houses were also famous for the number of criminals said to live there? That was also one of the reasons we decided to take our leave, right?

But of course those that they judged and throw criticizing glances at were actually the people who treated us with kindness though we admit it that, they were quite rough with their words and actions, though, it would always be better than those persons who act well and stab each other when we turn their backs around.

I believe you’re such a keen observant, aren’t you? You even notice when I don’t feel well or hiding something from you even of my acting skills, even if I show you my bright smile that I hate to show to anyone else. You don’t need to ask, you just know.

And that made me so afraid, for you to know what pains me, what makes me step away from you when we’re at the apartment we’re able to pay every month. I don’t want to see you crying like the day we received the news of our parents’ death, since even though I admit it that it’s such a beautiful sight, with your tear-streaked blushing cheeks, hugging me tightly as if you need me there for strength, I would never want to hear that sadness in your voice and see that hurt in your eyes.

I would never dare share this pain with you.

And I know I shouldn’t have been careless, which I got used to since we were kids, you know that habit of mine that just leaves my things and throw my clothes anywhere inside my room, right? And you remember that you scold me every time you caught me in the act for you end up not being able to stop yourself for tidying things and cleaning the room since, that’s your own habit.

Then you just laugh at it for we’re like married couples, even though were both males and treated each other like the brother from another parent.

Don’t deny that time though when you accepted my kiss when you were sleeping on the morning of your birthday, since, I saw you smiled. I’m happy that nothing changed though. Though I wanted to give you more kisses, I was already shy to do so even though I feel like you were waiting for me to do it first.

Don’t try denying that fact that there’s something different about us, okay? I know there is. I just know, just like when you know I’m trying to hide a stash of sweets when you told me to eat those in moderation.

By the way, I would miss that teddy bear of yours, your only toy of course since our parents are poor to buy us those modern games that don’t need our body to get tired when playing, and I’m sad that he wouldn’t be able to tell our tale to others, obviously.

That’s why I’m writing this, together with that diary about our lives without any guidance by the adults in the community. I enjoyed those moments by the way. I know you felt quite mad at me for I kept on hiding this on you but see, I successfully finished it without you knowing a bit of what I wrote.

And now I could imagine you reading this with that pretty eyes of yours, of course, I know how to flirt even through a letter, but only with you of course.

If you want to be nostalgic once in a while, the diary’s in the cupboard, behind those hideous green plants that you adore to eat with meat and curry. You’re such a big eater yet you don’t get fat, what’s wrong with you? And here I am starting to grow my own tummy. But that’s fine, just eat more. I left my savings for you as well, since I won’t need it where I’ll be. Spend your time and money wisely, and keep on loving life.

You deserve to live long.

I just, love, you, so, so so so much it’s better this way.

Take care, and don’t forget to clean again since, you know there’s an infected that lived in your house.

I love you.

P. S.

Don’t try to follow me or I’ll bite one of your feet off, literally.

 

\--

He could have been giving off a hearty laughter by now if it wasn’t for the fact that the person he cared so much simply left like that without telling him anything in person.

He knows something was off, but he didn’t pursue anymore, since he got used to Myungsoo keeping secrets and telling it to him in the end before he catch him himself. He was crying yet there was no sound. Sungjong knows it is crazy, to follow Myungsoo to whoever he needed to go.

Or where he thought he should be.

And Sungjong knows just what to do. He doesn’t fear death anymore, nor the pain he would be facing, but letting the person he loves slip off his hold and out of his sight without being able to answer back those words of affection, to him that’s unforgivable.

Totally stupid.

Not that what he’s planning is something that’s totally smart, for he knows how insane it is as well.

But no matter what, there’s no room for holding back and not take the risk.

Taking the diary and the money, filling his backpack with the clothes and food he’ll be needing for the trip, he folded the letter and slipped it in one of the secret pockets of his black coat and moved on with his plans.

A few minutes later and he found himself in one of the seats within the train that travels to both ends of the city, where his destination is bounded. Escaping the sight of the officers and breaking out the border would be another story and he wouldn’t want to stress himself further for now. After a biological warfare between joint countries, an outbreak of infection which effects resemble that of a walker erupted, making the city officials put barriers between cities to avoid spread to adjacent areas.

There had been cases of infection within the city though once in a while, the cause still in a blur until now. But if he needs to traverse each city just to find Myungsoo and give him a good whack on the head, and maybe a long kiss showing how much he loves him that he would never let him go afterwards.

Placing the diary between his palms, he placed a kiss on the cover before opening it and reading it to his heart’s content.

He would find Myungsoo, no matter how many infected he meets, and his tale outside the city is yet, another story to be told.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading until the end. Ciao.


End file.
